Driving up to the Sundance Film Festival with some friends, we passed through the Provo canyon and it being winter here, was nicely covered in a layer of snow. It's not exactly a secret, but I have a great love for snow and winter and in admiration for the spectacle of the frozen canyon, I pointed out how cool it all looked with an apparent air of amazement. Soon after I made this observation, my friend Melanie in the front seat turned back and said "Todd, I love how you get excited about the smallest things and the simplest elements of life excite you". Mildly taken aback, I tried to decipher whether this was exactly a compliment or a jab at my "simple mindedness". We got into a discussion about what she meant and we concluded that I am not numbed by the world and I take great joy in finding the amazing in the most menial of things.
"Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel
like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in"
I recently read an article that talked about how we can "be naked like a baby" and just as happy. The part I liked most about the article is the section on finding delight. It really captured the element of being a child. They are entranced by the simplest and little things of life. Waking up on Christmas and finding the object of their desiring for weeks preceding that morning wondering how Santa does it. Driving by the airport and watching an airplane take flight into the sky and feeling the roar of the engines. Watching a campfire dance and pop, while putting in sticks and pulling them out to closely examine the burning specimen. Wonderment at the things that are easily explained by drag and lift, flash point of carbon based objects, and your parents staying up late and pretending to be an old man. But alas, I find myself, a 23 year old man (read: 6'3" boy) still intrigued by these things. Just 3 weeks ago i woke up at 4 am wondering if it was time to see what "Santa" brought me and barely managed to fall back asleep. I get butterflies when the plane starts take off and I look out the window as we incline towards the heavens. And fire, well, I don't think I'll ever get tired of pyrotechnics and the likes thereof. It will always impress me.
"It's a great thing when you realize you still have
the ability to surprise yourself"
And I think it all comes back to the element of forgiveness and living in the present. People get stuck in the past and the things that happen. Overwhelmed with the perpetual blast of novelty from the world and in our race to learn as much as we can, we are quick to disregard the obvious and familiar in it's "simplicity". Granted life is about phases and progress, it is also important to not forget what first sparked that element of curiosity and interest in us as we developed our cognitive abilities. Living in the present allows us to fully feel each emotion as it happens and not divide them among past experiences that may cast a bitter taste on what was once a savory piece of our lives. Not to plagiarize, but through the conditioning of society we start acting like "adults" and follow a pattern, the way others expect us to act. We overly care about the opinion of others and are absent in the moment. We hold die hard grudges and frantically worry about daily tasks and problems. Worst of all, we don't get excited about seeing the snow fall and instead worry about how it will conflict with our plans. Live in the present and make hot chocolate while you relax and watch the snow. Me, I'll find a sled and hit the slopes and make the most of what I have and find the wonder in the moment, even if my face gets cold
"-Oww. Jeez... What was that for?
-It doesn't matter! It's in the past.
-Yeah, but it still hurts
-Oh yes, the past can hurt, but the way I see it, you can either
run from it, or learn from it."
It will still be worth it.
